Eternally
by MorbidTruth
Summary: One-shot songfic to "In the Shadows" by The Rasmus. Hermione and Draco are together, but Draco must let her go. Curses, love, and death. R for suicide.


Eternally.  
  
"No sleep, no sleep until I'm done with finding the answer. Won't stop, won't stop before I find a cure for this cancer. And sometimes, I feel like going down and so disconnected. But somehow, I know that I am haunted to be wanted."  
  
The moonlight was bright and illuminated the grounds well. Slivers of it fell across Hermione's face as she hurriedly walked to the tree where she was to meet Draco. She parted the branches of the weeping willow and let herself into the tent like area. The branches were so long and so thick that it was like being in a small room. She sat in the cool grass and silently waited for Draco. She listened intently when she heard quiet footsteps approaching her.  
  
Draco pushed the branches back to reveal Hermione sitting on the grass, dressed in her school robes and a long silky, blue nightgown. He sauntered over to her and helped her up. She smiled sadly up at him and waited for the kiss that she had needed for so long. When it came, it was like a bursting in her heart. His tongue slid past her lips and explored the already familiar mouth. The passion that erupted from the kiss died when he pulled away.  
  
"You know what I've come here to tell you," Draco said, his voice full of emotion, yet his eyes still cold and hard. His eyes had always been that way, cold and dead. Never showing emotion, except hate. But that was Lucius's fault, as he'd imprinted it on Draco's brain that the only respectable emotions to show were hate and indifference. Draco's had never changed, and most likely, never would.  
  
"Yes," Hermione replied, letting her eyes show what she was thinking, Why? She knew that Lucius was involved, but she didn't know exactly what was going on.  
  
"My father has not found out, but if he does, he will kill you and I refuse to let that happen." Draco looked at her in his hard way again, still determined on not showing anything.  
  
"Draco, I would die for you. You know that! I will die if it means that I can have you until then!" she cried in sadness. She pulled away from his arms that had been holding her to him. If he was going to forget her, she was not going to let him touch her.  
  
"I know, but I don't have enough strength to live without you!" he almost shouted in frustration.  
  
"I've been watching, I've been waiting in the shadows for my time. I've been searching, I've been living for tomorrows all my life."  
  
"You're a coward! Your fear of your father has made you blind! You will have to live without me if you do not keep seeing me anyway! It will be more painful for both of us if we were to try going day to day, seeing each other but never being with the other!" Tears streaked Hermione's flushed cheeks. She wanted to hit him as hard as she could, but all she did was shake her hands at him.  
  
"Yes, Hermione. I am a coward. I'll admit it. Gryffindor's are the brave ones, remember? I understand that it will be more painful to see you but not be with you, but I'd rather live that way, than have you dead, because of me," Draco whispered to her. This was not the reaction Hermione expected.  
  
"Please, don't let me go. You'll regret it and so will I!" she begged him. Tears formed in his eyes and he quickly tilted his head so he could wipe them away where she couldn't see. He watched her, waiting for her to accept what had to be.  
  
"Fine!" she half shouted, "I'll remind you of your mistake in seven years and let you know how happy I am without you!"  
  
"I'm sorry." Was all he could say to her.  
  
"May you always love me and want me, but never have me." She cursed him angrily.  
  
"And may you never love anyone but me." Draco answered. With that, he left her forever.  
  
The last year of school was horrible. Hermione went through it like a zombie, never once looking at Draco. Harry and Ron worried about her, but let it go. Draco dated other girls, but only wanted Hermione. He loved her to the bottom of his dark soul. He couldn't have her, ever.  
  
"They say, I must learn to kill before I can feel safe. But I, I'd rather kill myself than turn into their slave. And sometimes I feel that I should go and play with thunder. Cause somehow I just don't wanna stay and wait for a wonder.  
  
Lately I've been walking, walking in circles, watching, waiting for something. Feel me, touch me, heal me, come take me higher."  
  
Seven years after seventh year. Hermione is married to Ron.  
  
Hermione sat down at her desk, pulling out a piece of parchment and a quill.  
  
Dear Draco,  
  
As you may know, I'm married to Ron now. We've been happily married for two years, and we're expecting a baby soon.  
  
I promised I'd write you this letter, so here it is.  
  
I know that I've always loved you and I always will. You were and still are, the best thing that ever happened to me. You made me see that even my soul mate makes mistakes. I thought you were perfect; I was too blinded by your love to see your flaws. But when I saw them, it didn't make me want to leave you. Those flaws only made me love you more, because it made me see that you were human. Not a god, and not immortal or immune to pain. No matter how well you kept the pain out of your eyes, I still know you felt it. But I saw, in seventh year, what made me hurt the most. You could not stand for me to die, as willing as I was, because you are human! Not because you wanted to cause me pain, as I thought, but because you didn't want to feel pain. You have too much honor and pride, so much that you think you are above the feelings of every human. I understand all this now, but I have not forgiven you.  
  
I love Ron, but not the way I love you. You are the person I am meant to be with, and so I will never truly love Ron. I know that you will always love me, but you will never have me. You have been put under the curse, as you put me under. I hope this will be fixed some day. But that some day, is not today.  
  
I love you, more than life itself. That will be proved soon.  
  
Love Eternally,  
  
Hermione Weasley  
  
Hermione read the letter once through and then sent it off, before Ron got home. As soon as the owl was out of sight, Hermione took the knife Harry had given her as the War had started. She wrote a quick note to Ron and then let the blade take her soul from her body.  
  
When Ron arrived home and found his wife's body on the bed, in a pool of blood, he didn't see the note. Only after she had been taken away, and Harry had come to comfort Ron, was the note found. Harry picked it up and read it. Shocked into silence, he handed it to Ron.  
  
Ron & Harry,  
I'm sorry for the lies I've told you for the past two years. I want to apologize for all the wrongs I've committed in this life. I have been deprived of the man I'm in love with for too long. I cannot live without him and so I have taken my life. I hope you find it in your hearts to forgive me for causing you this pain, but I cannot go on without him. I love you both very much and I'm truly sorry.  
  
Eternally,  
Hermione Granger Malfoy  
  
Just as Ron finished the letter with a gasp, Draco burst into the room with wild eyes.  
  
"She's gone isn't she!" he shouted at Ron and Harry. Harry quickly took Draco by the shoulders and tried to calm him down.  
  
"Yes, she's gone. She left us a note," Harry replied and took the note from Ron's now white hands, handing it to Draco. Draco read it and reread it.  
  
"It's my fault. I shouldn't have left her. Now I will have to live without her again. Just as I tried to prevent in seventh year," Draco was saying this more to himself than to Ron and Harry.  
  
Sixth months after Hermione's passing.  
  
Draco stood at the edge of the cliff, staring at the ocean. Hs robes twisted around him in the wind as he gazed at the rocks below. This was how he wanted to go. He didn't want to be found, not like Hermione. He just wanted to be considered missing; never letting anyone know that he was dead. And so, taking one last look at Hermione's picture and one last breath, he stepped off the cliff. He let the wind carry him, until he hit the sharp rocks and the sea swept his body off into oblivion. 


End file.
